Merry Christmas!

IMG_5086
Originally uploaded by sjross

Life lesson

Never hide in the bathtub with the curtain closed so that you can jump out and shout "Boo!" at your son while he is going pee. Really, profoundly, truly BAD idea.

Merry Craziness...

Christmas makes me insane every year. We've tried to simplify each year, and somehow it still ends up over-committed, over-spent, and just so busy. So I'm sorry - I'm kind of disappearing for a few weeks while I drown in gift wrap and baking...hopefully I'll be up for air soon.

The good news - I think - is that Nate's now home for THREE whole weeks. So I'm hoping for a moment or two to myself, childless, to (gasp) shower, shop, and otherwise behave like an adult. I'm very much looking forward to it.

I read today a column by Emily Lemmons. She quoted someone who said "I had thought joy to be rather synonymous with happiness, but it seems now to be far less vulnerable than happiness. Joy seems to be a part of an unconditional will to live, not holding back because life may not meet our preferences and expectations. Joy seems to be a function of the willingness to accept the whole, and to show up to meet with whatever is there. It has a kind of invincibility that attachment to any particular outcome would deny us. "

So I'm wishing all of you, my lovelies, a very merry Christmas and a new year in which the joy totally overcomes the sorrows.

Ugh...pledge month.

Detroit Public TV is killing me. Slowly but surely killing me. They're in the middle of a $22 million dollar campaign to switch to digital broadcasting. So their pledge drive is going on until they raise it all - it's been over 2 weeks already...

This happens to coincide with our decision to get rid of cable (and my beloved TiVo - sniff). It was actually great for a while - Josh loved Sid the Science Kid and Martha Speaks, and I was enjoying the limited amount of tv we watched.

BUT they've now switched to running the same stupid shows over and over each morning - Curious George, Clifford, and freaking Dragon Tales. And the couple that does the pledge drive - OMG. That's all I can say.

Someone please stick a pencil in my ear and end my misery.

4 year stats

Josh is officially a giant...

44-1/4 lbs

45" tall

Off the charts once again - this time closer to an average 6 year old!

Sadie's on a roll!

4 years

Seriously...how did this:

turn into this:

so quickly?


He's
so
very
old.

School pictures

Josh's preschool pictures arrived today. Okay, seriously - does this look like an almost-4 year old? He looks like 6...it kills me.

Laughing

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Originally uploaded by sjross

I've been crazy busy the last week or two. I have nothing to blog about, and no time to do it. So I apologize - this is my lame attempt at blogging in the interim.

But I'm sorry - she's so freaking cute that you have to forgive me. Right?

Batmen

Batmen
Originally uploaded by sjross

Two months old

11 lbs, 10 oz. (70th %ile)
23-3/4" long (90th %ile)

And in true Ross fashion, head in the 95th percentile. We've all got gigantic noggins around here!

Super Joshua

Click here to watch the video or make your own.

8 weeks old

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Originally uploaded by sjross

Time has really flown by...in just eight short weeks, Josh started school, broke his arm, bruised a tooth, got a black eye, started reading & spelling like a madman, and has absolutely loved his sister to bits.

In the same eight weeks, Sadie has lost a pound, packed several back on, had a ton of hair, lost a ton of hair, started smiling, cooed, blew spit bubbles, rolled herself onto her tummy, scooted out of the Boppy, lifted her head and looked all around, and ate, slept, and pooped. A lot.

Getting our election swag

Happy Halloween!

These are not actually the kids' costumes. These are everyday apparel around here :)

Photos from Josh's Halloween parade, Zoo Boo, and some random snaps from the last few weeks are all in Flickr - check the link up above.

Sort of a smile

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Originally uploaded by sjross

They're a little to quick & unpredictable to catch them regularly...but this was the beginning of one.

Baby push-ups

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Originally uploaded by sjross

She looks so surprised!

Post #334: In Which I Openly Acknowledge My Denial.

Yesterday was National Stillbirth & Infant Loss Awareness Day. All the deadbaby mamas posted about it, and asked people to light a candle at 7pm. The lovely Aunt Becky even listed the losses she knew so we could see each other and remember.

And what did I do? I stuck my head in the sand. I didn't want to think about it. But late last night as I lay in bed, it crept up. And I remember.

Last week I looked at Sadie and caught a glance of Isabel for the first time. The shape of her small open mouth, her deep-set, almond-shaped eyes, the pug nose. I looked at Sadie and saw her sister. And then it felt very real all over again.

See, I've been able to push it all down since I crossed the bridge and had a living baby. And here it all was back again. So let me openly acknowledge that forever, I will be one of them - a deadbaby mama in the deadbaby club. And pretending that I don't see it or remember will not make it go away.

Isabel Grace was born on Sunday, July 29th 2007 at 10:14 am. She was 8.5 inches long and weighed 7 ounces. We wanted her, loved her, and very much miss her.

I remember you, Isabel. And I always will.

Sadie & Grammy

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Originally uploaded by sjross

Welcome Clementine!

Our friends Christian & Keri welcomed their beautiful baby girl on Saturday:

Clementine Eloise CollisonOctober 11, 2008 7:45PM
7lbs. 5 oz. 21.5” long

I'm so, so happy for you guys!

She's growing!

It took a while, but Miss Sadie finally started gaining weight. A week ago, she still hadn't gone back to her birth weight. Today, she's at 9 lbs, 7 oz and 22-1/4". And so the doc said I can stop waking her to feed her and - HALLELUJAH!!! - let her sleep through the night. It seems sick & wrong to wake a sleeping baby (and her mother).

Can you believe it's been a month already? She's also lifting her head, looking around, following you with her eyes, and started smiling at us a couple of days ago. So hooray for growing, vibrant babies.

One Month Old

One Month Old
Originally uploaded by sjross

Welcome to the world!

Congratulations to our friends Dave & Karen on the birth of their son (the only testosterone in our Bradley class)!

Anthony John
1015am
8lbs 13oz
22''

Freakishly strong baby

Freakishly strong baby
Originally uploaded by sjross

Broken arm

Broken arm
Originally uploaded by sjross

Yes, we're alive...

Sorry Internet, we've ignored you. It has been a crazy week to say the least. In a nutshell:

• Josh broke his arm - compound fractures in both ulna and radius. Cast up to his shoulder. Very mopey 3-1/2 year old. Not fun.
• Thrush for Sadie and me. Also not fun.
• A little mastitis - hell, why not? Did I mention not fun?
• Nate went back to work. Of course - pissed off baby, gimp toddler, work widow...say it with me - NOT FUN!!!

So we're surviving but not blogging much. Am still trying to get pics in Flickr regularly so visit us there.

Back soon darlings :)

Bright eyes

Bright eyes
Originally uploaded by sjross

Say Click! Take a pic!

While I'm sure the novelty will eventually wear off, for now we're staying pretty camera-happy. Check my Flickr for your daily Superman & Sadie fix...

Happy Anniversary

Thanks for spending the last 9 years with me, babe. I can't imagine spending the rest of my years with anybody else...I love you.

Why I Understand Josh's Superhero Fetish

Wonder Woman (I wore these everywhere)
Originally uploaded by sjross

She made it!

Josh had to bring a family photo to school today. I was quite pleased that the timing worked out and the Little Miss made it into the picture.

And hooray - we're going home today. I'm looking forward to it...I've really missed Josh. And sleeping without 8 million interruptions. And food with SALT and SPICES and COLOR. Home home home!

Baby love

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Originally uploaded by sjross

Baby photos

Check my Flickr for photos - we'll try to upload regularly over the next few days.

She's finally here!

Please help us welcome our daughter Sadie Elizabeth Ross to the world. She was born at 9:41PM, she's 20 3/4 inches and weighs 8 lbs 12 ozs. Everyone is doing well, praise the Lord for his faithfulness. More details later.

baby ross is finally on her way!

my niece has apparently *finally* decided to grace us with her presence today.

i'll post more details as soon as i hear!

Back to school...

First day of school last year and this year

What a difference a year makes! On his first day a year ago, Josh clung to my leg, sobbing, begging me to stay with him. This year, my little friend couldn't get out of the car and into his classroom fast enough - I had to make him come back to even say goodbye to me. That was much easier, but a little bittersweet. So much for my mama's boy...

And just for good measure, so you can see how he grew over the summer. This is the last day of school at the end of May, compared with today. He'll be taller than me before he reaches upper elementary!

Dora is growing on me...

Seriously - she has historically made me insane, but I'm a sucker for these dubbed-over videos. Almost as enjoyable as the Wiggles ones!

Large and in charge...

Seriously - could it get any bigger?

This is the difference between an early baby and a late one - half a pound a week. Josh was 7 lbs 7 oz @ 38 weeks. I definitely feel much bigger this time, and while I put pretty much ZERO stock in the ultrasound tech's ability to predict the size even remotely accurately, I'm starting to think the 9 to 9-1/2 lb estimate might not be so far off.

I swear if she doesn't get out soon, I'll split in two!

Welcome baby...um, no, not really.

So...NO change from my appointment last week. Seriously - NO change. Not the most encouraging appointment ever. Due today, feel less like something's going to happen than I did a week ago. This girl is all snuggled up and not going anywhere anytime soon.

So what does that mean? Probably an induction next week. Unless she changes her mind and comes out on her own, that will be the next step. Oh joy - Pitocin here we come!

Welcome baby Meren!

Congratulations to Christian & Brittan Vanover, who welcomed their baby girl early this morning.

Meren Jaclyn Vanover
born August 30, 2008 at 3:08 am
8 lbs, 5 oz
20 inches long

Michigan State Fair

Josh & Evelyn
Originally uploaded by sjross

Last night we went to the State Fair with the Kelso family. Josh & Evelyn had a blast.

It's totally overpriced - $32 for our tickets & parking - but a really unique experience, and I think a quite interesting snapshot of life in Michigan, from the farm animals to the attendees...I highly recommend it.

Lots more photos in my Flickr account.

Boys @ the park

Superman Likes Sandboxes Too
Originally uploaded by How Bourgeois

A photo Lauren took @ the park this week.

The cape is getting to be a staple around here. Nate is annoyed but I can't fault Josh too much - I wore my Wonder Woman Underoos on top of my clothes for QUITE a long time...

Life goes on...

So nothing to report here. Contractions pretty much stopped. I don't know what that was - I'm defying all my childbirth books. Braxton-Hicks shouldn't do what these contractions did, and yet they stopped, baby stayed in, and life is somewhat back to normal.

I'll keep you posted :)

And all is quiet on the (mid)western frontier...

We've had an interesting couple of days. I started having contractions Friday - they never materialized into much of anything, never got closer than 8 mins apart, and stopped overnight. Yesterday, I woke up with contractions 4 minutes apart, that within an hour were 3 minutes apart, and stayed strong and consistent most of the day. They got to be around 90 seconds long, and I thought we were headed somewhere.

Alas, no. Slowed down again, and here we are. 10 days from my due date, and I've no idea what to expect. Things were radically different with Josh because my water broke and I was subsequently induced - there's no stopping Pitocin contractions, and so he was born 4-1/2 hours after the IV went in. Last year's induction was with Cytotec - even more intense than the Pit, and nothing remotely natural about it.

I feel sort of like a first-timer, despite having already given birth twice. I don't know what my body does naturally. I had hoped I would be more of a Speedster-type laborer. I have to admit, I sort of envy my friend Megan's super-powered 5-hour intense rocket ride with Ava.

I'm starting to suspect, however, that I might just be a Putterer. So, I'm settling in for a long-ish, unpredictable trip...an interesting adventure for a super-planner.

Cuilness

While I haven't found it to be as accurate as Google, I have to admit, the flashiness of Cuil has me totally sucked in.

Hey - I can't help it...Marketing is my thing...it's bound to work on me. Check it out - it really is quite cool.

One year later...

Day Out with Thomas @ Crossroads Village in Flint. My how they've grown...

The rest of the photos are in a Flickr set here.

Turn baby turn!

Good news - the moxibustion, the headstands, the pulsatilla, the hanging-upside-down, the prayer...all of it, some of it, something WORKED! At my appointment yesterday, baby was head-down! Not engaged, but pointed in the right direction. I'm so encouraged...this means no Version, which means baby will come on her own time. So while we may still end up having her next week, it could also be a month from now.

For once, I'm actually enjoying uncertainty.

Light 'em up!

I picked up my moxa sticks today, so we'll be smoking some herb around here for the next week or two...cross your fingers!

**Update: Okay, so can I tell you, these things seriously smell like weed. I was slightly amused and slightly embarrassed to be sitting on our patio in a cloud of marijuana-ish funk. We'll see if it does anything - no change so far, and we're both still skeptical. If it works, it's awesome. If not, well, I've just made myself smell like I went to a Phish concert for no reason.

Welcome to the world!

Congratulations to our good friends Ryan & Megan! Ava Elizabeth Fluetsch was born this morning at 6:10. She weighed 9 lbs 7 oz and was 22 inches long.

More details and pictures are available on their blog.

Someone please wake me up...

Thank you, Kylinn. Josh is walking around singing Hannah Montana songs. That is sooooo sick & wrong.

You can stop laughing now.

Weird conversations with sexist 3 year olds.

I'm going to summarize a conversation Josh & I had last week...we were talking about babies, and he told me he's going to have 7 babies one day - 3 boys and 4 girls. I asked him who was going to be his wife, and then had to explain to him why he can't marry his grandmas or cousin.

Josh: Well, Evelyn has a bunch of baby stuff so she must want a lot of kids. I'll marry her.
Me: That's good. Do you think she wants to have 7 kids?
Josh: Yes, she does. And do you know what we'll name them?
Me: What?
Josh: My boys are Peter, John, and Michael.
Me: Cool - like Peter Pan?
Josh: Yes. And my girls are Wendy, Sadie, Charlotte, and Meagan. And mom [looking around], we're going to need a bigger car.
Me: Well Josh, when you're grown up and married, you'll buy your own car.
Josh: Actually, I'm just going to borrow a car next time daddy goes on a trip.
Me: And you'll drive all your kids around?
Josh: No, my wife will have to do it because I need to work. That's why you have a wife - to watch all your kids.

So there, from a 3 year old's perspective, is most of my adult life simplified - I'm the babysitter.

Moxibustion, anyone?

So I'm going tomorrow to an acupuncturist to pick up some moxibustion herbs & instructions. And that is without question one of the weirdest, most out-of-character things I've ever said. I swear, I'm turning into a crazy hippie. Supposedly, it has a pretty high success rate at turning breech babies.

We'll see if it works. I'm also going to start regularly making a giant ass out of myself doing headstands at the pool.

Have you ever had a breech baby? What did you do, and did it work?

Coupons?

Okay this is probably a little tacky but hey, we're all friends here, right? So I'm wondering if any of you have spare Michael's coupons - I'd like to get 5-6 of their 40% off coupons (which are in the paper almost every week) so I can buy some baskets for the baby's closet...let me know :)

One year

I've spent the last week trying to figure out what to say today. I've come to the conclusion that I don't have anything in me at the moment, but I do want to acknowledge today.

One year ago today, my life turned upside-down. Since then, I feel stronger in a lot of ways, weaker in almost as many, and I have to admit, I'm very different from the person I was. I think all 3 of us are - Josh still has no idea what happened but the emotion in the house has scarred him too. We all wear the scars of the last year, and while they have faded and are not so red & angry, they're still there, and definitely not disappearing.

So we survived - despite ourselves. And with 5 weeks until this next baby is born I'm feeling hope. That's a very nice change.

Update

So she's not humongous. Don't get me wrong, she's no petite flower. They estimate her to currently be around 5lbs, 15 oz, in the 78th percentile. That would translate to around 9 to 9-1/2lbs @ full-term. But they don't think I'll go full term, so she's more likely to be between 8-9. I can live with that...

The new challenge is that she's breech - frank breech, to be precise. She's got a few weeks here to turn before they schedule a version - I've done that once and I'd prefer not to do that again if I can help it. So I'll be laying around with my hips in the air, swimming, and probably trying Webster technique over the next couple of weeks. Ahh, the excitement...

Cross your fingers/pray/do whatever you do...

I have a big baby ultrasound today at 1pm. I'm measuring 5 weeks ahead now. That has slowly happened - at last month's appointment I measured 3 weeks ahead. So, they're doing an ultrasound to see how big this chick is, or if it's fluid, or if it's me, or whatever...

So if you think of me this afternoon, say a quick prayer...I'm afraid of starting down the slippery slope of early induction...

Vote Yes on August 5th

The Detroit Zoo needs our help. In 2006, the Zoo's lost public funding ceased when the City of Detroit turned responsibility of the Zoo over to the Detroit Zoological Society. Since then, it's been a struggle to replace that money in other ways.

As you know, the Zoo has entertained, educated and thrilled every child in the tri-county area for generations. In fact, 85% of the Zoo's visitors live in Macomb, Oakland or Wayne counties - which is why the three counties have drafted a millage proposal to help our Zoo out.

What's the cost? Not much. For the average home in the tri-county area, it's about $10 a year.

Want to know more or request a "Vote Yes" yard sign? Click here.

Pottery studio in Fishtown

Pottery studio in Fishtown
Originally uploaded by sjross

My favorite of all the pics Nate took up north...love the contrast of the red bike against the weathered wood.

And BINGO was her name-o

So who keeps voting for Moxie? Dude, so totally NOT going to happen. I still like Charlotte - despite my husband's insistence that everyone will call her Charlotte the Harlot.

Seriously - 12 year old trapped in a 32-year old body.

Wacky Pirate Wednesday

Today was Wacky Pirate Wednesday @ the Detroit Science Center. The pirate exhibit was way cool - I highly recommend it. Josh was a little freaked out by some overly-enthusiastic adult pirates there...other than that, we had fun.

Pardon the lame camera phone pic - will steal Daedra's as soon as they're online.

What we've had to say...

Thanks to Tash for the link.

Josh & Grampy

Josh & Grampy
Originally uploaded by sjross

An Open Letter to Pirates Everywhere

Dear Pirates:

Don't come here or the superheroes will fight you and put you in jail. And you should be scared away. You should only be in movies.

Our dog Sasha will protect the house and you will not be happy if you break it. So stay away.

You will not beat my dad. And we will beat all of you. My dad will take the last weapon from you. We will knock you in the water. We will fight you.

And you will not fight Mr. Smee.

Sincerely,

Joshua Ross

Sent in a bottle down the river to ward off any pirates that might be considering an attack on our house.

Help!

I think part of the problem is that we saw Joshua really clearly at his ultrasound - great profile, etc. We looked at him and named him then - the name was on our list, but like #4. But he looked like a Josh. And when he came out, he looked like the ultrasound - he still looked like a Josh.

This time, the jumping bean wouldn't look at us at all. She actually covered her face with her hands and turned away. So I didn't really get to see her face. And I'm struggling to commit because she might come out and I'll go, "Ooh, she's not a Charlotte at all." Or whatever. I actually contemplated doing the 4D ultrasound just to get another look and chickened out after seeing the Bradley ultrasound video.

For the record, Charlotte actually isn't even on the list anymore, despite my liking it. I somehow married a man who stayed 12 years old on the inside...this means that every name I suggest has to make it through the name-rhyming game. So Charlotte the Harlot - not so much. Don't even get me started about Felicia - you can imagine I'm sure.

So bottom line - I haven't seen her, my husband is a prepubescent teenager, and we're still nameless with 10 weeks to go.

Okay, give me some feedback. When did you name your children - while pregnant? After they were born? Did you have a list? Did you change your mind?

If only we were celebrities

Nate's favorite name? Moxie Crimefighter. I kid you not. Penn Jillette named his daughter that a few years ago, and Nate fell in love.

No wonder I can't pick a name - how can I compete with Moxie freaking Crimefighter?

What's in a name?

I find myself completely confounded at the prospect of naming this little one. It's important to me that not only does it sound good on the surface, but that it has a really good meaning. Shakespeare said, "That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet." But is that true?

A few that I've liked fell off the list quickly when I found out they meant things like bitter or tiresome. Seriously...who in good conscience could give their daughter a name that means those things? I happen to believe that the name bears real significance - that it's one of the first real identifying characteristics we place on our children, and that the name we speak over them has life in it. And so I'm stuck.

I am 40,000 names deep into my 75,000 baby names book. I have a long list of maybes, but none that really sing to me yet. I have 11 weeks to go - let's pray that changes soon!

South Haven

We're back from camping with the Surowiecs. Lots of lightening and rain, but lots of fun too. And maybe the worst sunburn I've ever had.

First & Last

3 year old preschool - before & after