Perspective

I remember looking at Kylinn in the hospital about an hour after Josh was born. She was 5 months old at the time, and she looked like she had doubled in size almost overnight. I had a similar sensation today...we spent a few hours hanging out with Josh's brand new cousin Tegan and I swear that in the course of two weeks, Josh has suddenly gotten enormous.

I knew Josh wasn't a baby (he is 2 for crying out loud) but seriously - when did he turn into a mutant monster jumbo toddler? Wow. It's very weird to see him sitting next to Tegan - I guess that's what a little perspective will do.

Book Club

I'm currently reading Babyproofing Your Marriage with Nate. It's a funny, very honest look at how having a baby turns your life upside down.

I highly recommend it to all new (or recent) parents.

Further evidence that I am old...

When I was younger, birthdays used to be a big deal. And I always felt a need to dress for the occasion - usually a brand spankin' new birthday outfit from my mom. You had to LOOK extra-special because on your birthday you WERE extra-special.

So today, I am 31. And my, how things have changed. I went upstairs to survey my options, and had the exact opposite reaction. I thought "it's my birthday, and if I want to look like a total schlub and wear yoga pants out in public, then I will."

So there you have it, three decades of wisdom boiled down to a pair of stretchy pants.

Joshua's brand spankin' new cousin

Seriously, have you checked this kid out? He's adorable.

It's funny...

I started a post this way before, didn't I? Yes, this one, on the same topic. Well, that is funny.

So to give you another sneak-peak into my life, we've been trying - unsuccessfully - to get pregnant since early Fall. Not militant crazy trying, but earnestly trying. And I've grown increasingly frustrated each month as we've failed. I was starting, quite honestly, to be at the end of my rope...there's not an obvious reason why NOT. Or so I thought.

I have epilepsy - that's always been a huge source of shame for me, so I don't often talk about it. I have been medicated for pretty much 21 years straight to control it. I've had 5 seizures since I was 9 years old - the last one was 11 years ago. I've gone through I-can't-tell-you-how-many different medications. They all have different, odd side effects. Some make you dumb, some make you dopey, some make you hairy...it's always a matter - for me at least - of choosing the absolute minimum my body requires.

While I was pregnant with Joshua, they had to increase my medication level 6 times to compensate for the increased blood volume. And it didn't really help - I still had some weird headaches and breakthrough stuff...basically, my left arm was numb for like 6 months. Not cool. So after he was born, I went through a long process of switching to a new, safe medication - Lamictal. It was supposed to be one of the best - no side effects, safe in pregnancy, safe for nursing, etc. Or so I thought...

So what's the point of this whole diatribe and all the rabbit trails? The point is this - Lamictal is actually not safe. The FDA reported recently that they've seen a high incidence of cleft palates in babies born to mothers taking Lamictal. That's pretty serious.

So basically, it's a blessing - and I seriously mean that - that I haven't gotten pregnant. Because I've been oblivously taking a medication that would likely cause a significant birth defect. So after 5 months of frustration, I'm honestly GLAD to report that I am NOT pregnant.

And so now, I'll go back to the doctor and start the process of changing medications all over again. I'll keep you posted.

Well fancy meeting you here...

Monday, I bought a new memory card for our digital camera at Target. It appears that we aren't the first people to use it...This is a photo of a totally random person. The new card came with a handful of pictures of her. Very weird.

It's a boy!!!

Tegan Dayton Vanover was born today at 6:50 am. Baby Tegan is 7 lbs, 8 oz and 21-1/2" long. Both mom & baby are doing well.

New Year's Resolution

In the year 2007 I resolve to: Wear my underwear on the outside of my pants. Get your resolution here.

For the record, when I was a preschooler, I did this regularly. But let's be honest - if you had Wonder Woman Underoos, wouldn't you do it too?

This is Mama's House...

If you have - or have had - a toddler, then you know that toddlers are almost always at their worst when you need them to be their best. Baby On Bored shared a story today about flying with a screaming toddler. I so can relate. I think every mother of a two year old can feel her pain - nobody wants to be "those people" on a plane, in a restaurant, at the grocery store...

In my life Before Child (B.C.) I hated those people. I saw bad parents, lack of discipline, lazy parenting, you name it...they were failing miserably, and impacting my ability to fly/eat/shop in peace. Rude, horrible people.

Now, After Delivery (A.D.), I feel their pain. I want to cry with them, hug them and reassure them that I know their child is a mutant evil monster, and I don't blame them. I know exactly how they feel, how aware they are of every eye on them, and every whisper...I know what it feels like to have an entire drugstore line look at you and assess your parenting ability based on one tantrum over an Elmo lunchbox.

Now, I want to beat up everyone in the place who's giving that Mom a dirty look. That Mom is one of Us. And it's not her fault that her child refused to take his nap today, got all sugared up because some idiot relative thought he should have candy corn, and then proceeded to run laps around Kroger. That Mom is as much a victim as you are, perhaps more, because she has to take him home with her. So you best step off - she's with Us, and we're not taking any more of that crap.

Moms, unite. We're taking back the airport. And the grocery store. And the drug store. And Starbucks. And all the places we hide from now that we have children. If you want peace and quiet, go to the library. But not during storytime, because that's ours too.

Retail therapy, round #2

So Nate left tonight for Lansing - AGAIN. That, I have to say, is getting old. So I have a new plan this week - I'm still most likely shopping every day - why not? - but am also overcommitting myself so I don't feel lonely. So this week, I'll mallwalk with Daedra a few times, babysit my niece, get my teeth cleaned, work out at Lauren's, go to Kids Korner on Thursday (you should come!), go to tumbling class on Friday, and maybe even try Jazzercise - don't ask.

And then next week, we add back in swimming lessons, storytime @ the library. I also have my eyes set on a Bringing Up Boys class, swing dancing, and a stained glass class. One registration fee at a time, I'm filling up every waking moment for the next few months. So hopefully between that and my measly 10-hour-per-week job, I'll have enough of a life that I won't pine away at home as a work widow.

And maybe - just maybe - I'll actually stick to a few of these commitments. And if i manage to do that, perhaps I will finally fall into a regular routine for the first time since I left my job and stayed home with Joshua. And maybe - just maybe - that will mean that I'll feel sort of pulled-together again, and be some semblance of my old structured self.

Target, don't worry - I won't desert you. I promise to still visit you at least twice a week and catch up on old times.